Top: Shows several symptoms of having been through abuse
Bottom: Can’t remember when/who/how you got them
can’t remember most of childhood? check. intense fear of making mistakes? check. low self-esteem and overall feeling of incompetence? check. ashamed of strong emotions and unable to cry? check. afraid of doing anything that might anger parents? check… and yet i can’t say why i’m like this because i don’t even know. did my mom overstep her bounds when she was angry, or am i too sensitive? was she emotionally distant, or was i too secretive? was i ever bullied? did i have bad friendships? bad teachers? i don’t know whether i have repressed memories or if i could have simply inflated tiny incidents in my head and done this to myself. i feel like there has to be something that happened that makes me act and feel the way i do, but my parents care about and want what’s best for me and i can’t remember anything they’ve done in my past that would undoubtedly be abuse… sometimes, i don’t feel like i should be calling myself a “survivor" if i can’t even pinpoint what i survived.